God Played Dice and I Lost !!!

How should I tell her that she is much more to me
How should I make her look at what I see
I still dont know where I am and where I will be
But I know what I am and what about her do I feel

She doesnt know, I admit this and am helpless
But my feelings for her are nothing but selfless
Beneath my laughs and smiles which the world sees
No one has realized the pain I have, no one knows the real me

God is playing dice with me as the bet
For years I have been pawned around the silhouette
Am I destined to lose everything I desire
I believe the last spark is dying down in my inner fire

I still wanted her to read this before that spark blows away
I do not know where should I start and what to say
It was a rainy evening, when I first saw her and fell in love
As autumn sets in, my heart is crumbling and blowing away

Order in Chaos !!!

Why do butterflies flap their wings?
Why do birds moving out south sing?
Chaos answers a lot about all
But finding order in chaos is the toughest of all

Why do smoke patterns form?
Why are ant colonies so and what are swarms?
Chaos is the name given by wise men to these
But order in chaos is what poses them with a tease

I am no magician, no mathematician, not a physicist at all
Still I observe a subtle order in the leaves flying every fall
An interesting observation I noticed one day
Human beings are the most chaotic if seen that way

We speak a lot that doesn’t makes sense
We feel emotions and talk about feelings that make us tense
We laugh and cry at the same time and call for celebrations
We give into our dark desires and unknown temptations

I wonder if god really plays dice with us
I wonder why a small nudge by a stranger made us miss our bus
Its too tough to talk here and understand the fact
Chaos is alive and bonded to our lives by a secret pact